The fitness goddess, Rosemary Connelly

Have you ever heard of Rosemary Connelly? She does the fitness videos and diet books. You may remember her famous ‘Hip and Thigh’ diet. Her hair probably looked quite good in the eighties, but she’s not changed it since then, so now, in 2007, she looks weird. Questionable appearance aside, she does good aerobic workout videos. Very simple and straightforward, so even someone as uncoordinated as me can follow. I have a small collection of her cheesy workout DVDs, and I set aside half an hour each day to sweat like a pig to her cheerful, unwavering enthusiasm for fitness. God bless her. She’s going to give me a toned stomach. I can’t go to the gym you see, like a normal person. When I sweat I go red, and look disgusting, and I’m shockingly unfit, and the thought of another person seeing me in that state is terrifying. So Rosemary Connelly it is. I’ve put on a pound (muscle hopefully) and I have begun to notice stomach shrinkage. Nothing too dramatic though, which is annoying.